Well...it all started 9 days ago. It's Wednesday, may 17, 2017 today. Last Sunday night, my baby Noah got the groups really bad. You had trouble breathing, so we gave the emergency steroid, put you in a steamy bathroom, then cold air to help. It was scary. On Monday I stayed home with you to make sure you are okay and promised work that I'll be in Wednesday or Friday to make up for it (I work from home on those days). Tuesday we all went to work and daycare but in the afternoon they called us to say you can open your right eye and it might be pink eye, which means no daycare for at least 24 hours. So we took you back to the doctor, where the confirmed its pink eye and you got an antibiotic ointment. My poor thing, how on earth you got pink eye on top of croup?:( I stayed home with you on Wednesday again. This was unbearable I'm not going to lie to you. We scheduled the siding people at our house for last week, thinking we won't be home much anyway - it's a lot of banging all day long 7am-7pm. But this was the third day home, and of course since daddy was outside, you wanted nothing to do with me. Just daddy daddy daddy. Eventually I took you out but then daddy said it's not a good idea because of all the nails...so what was I supposed to do. And in he meantime I was supposed to work. Anyway, i gave up by noon and decided to just play with Gu:) we had fun but I could tell something was not right with you. Sure enough by the evening you had high fever. We called the doctor and they said it probably just the croup and pink eye virus running their course, so we can just give Tylenol. By the morning your fever was 102 so we called the doctor again. I took you in but they didn't say anything wrong, so we were sent home thinking it's just a nasty virus and we need to alternate Tylenol and Motrin every 2-3 hours to keep the fever down. But it kept rising and by Friday night you were delirious from the fever. We took you to the doctor again and asked them to run every possible test. I said I don't care what they think if it, I want you to get tested. Thank god i was adement. As unlikely as it is under age 2, you got strep!!! My goodness. Strep is brutal even for an adult let alone Gu my sweet baby. It was unbearable to watch you in that much pain and fever and not know why or how we can help more. You didn't eat for three days, and mostly you just slept or tried to drink water or was loaded with meds. I hated it. I love you so much, like you are a part of me that when you hurt I hurt. I know you are daddy's boy and you only want him, but just know (one day you will with your own child) that doesn't make my love any less for you. The worry for your child is truly excruciating.
Needless to say I didn't go to work all week. I felt horrible about as I just got back after three months of maternity leave. But there was no way I'm leaving you Nehemiah you are that sick. You might want to be with daddy only but mommy is mommy and I swear no one knows you as much as I do. That is why I knew to ask for tests. I knew it's not a virus. I just knew.
Of course Mother's Day weekend was still filled with the illness. By Saturday night Ollie developed a bad cough so we had to take him too. He has no fever so not much they can do. Monday you both went to school but we got the inevitable call in the pm that Ollie has the pink eye. So there I was rushing out of work, telling my boss I can't go in next day either. So I spent yesterday with Ollie at home. Thank goodness that you Noah feeling better although strangely you are still not yourself. You wake in the middle of the night screaming bloody murder and you have a very bad, unusually bad temper. I don't know how to jelly up. I want to but I'm lost.
Some say it's because of the week long fever and pain and illness. Some says it's because you realized Ollie is here to stay. Some say it's just the age. I don't know. I want to be there for you and help you but you do t really let me and it breaks my heart. Naturally as a mom, your mom, I am not giving up. I'll never give up. I'll always be there for you.
So here we are on day 10 of this crazy rollercoaster ride and I'm hoping we are out of the worst of it.
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